The Curse of Being an Empath

The Curse of Being an Empath

emotions

Fueled by TV shows or comics, we all fantasised about becoming super heroes as children… Some of us wanted to fly, some wished to be invisible while some indecisive others went back and forth; having a hard time choosing from a range of super powers like mind reading, teleportation, breathing underwater, bending elements (thanks for this one Avatar!) etc… but none of us ever wanted to possess the power to fix the world… especially the broken people roaming it.

When we grew up into adulthood, some of our super-power embedded childhood dreams came true as we walked down the career path to became firefighters, cops, doctors, teachers etc…. in other words; realistic superheroes of the modern age. But still, none of these careers involved fixing broken people (Unfortunately, nobody considers psychologists as superheroes).

Enter the scene “Empaths”: the human aerials for human emotions, believing that our only mission in this miserable world is to make people happy. We are modern superheroes, too. The only difference is that we didn’t choose to be empaths; or in other words, to suffer by embracing others’ screwed up emotions. As empaths we literally feel what others feel… we are often attracted by emotionally scarred people and try to fix them by performing our art. The happier we make people, the happier we become as we take in positive feelings as well.

Sounds good?

Then, how come it’s a curse?

Imagine sitting peacefully in a not so-crowded cafe sipping your drink in a self-induced bliss. However, it’s close to lunchtime and suddenly the cafe starts swarming with people of all sorts. All the empty tables around you are taken and clamour starts running rampage… it’s not the gibberish mix of sounds bothering you… it’s the uproar of the alien emotions flowing into your mind all at once just like looking right into the Aleph of mixed feelings. You look to your right, see three men in suits, check them out one by one as anger, greed and envy starts crawling into your soul in the same order of appearance. You turn your head to the left, see an attractive woman with her eyes glued onto her latte and disappointment rushes into your soul. You don’t even have to look behind you to feel the guiltiness ready to invade your soul. Suddenly, you feel pain in your gut accompanied with extreme bowel movement, you are almost sure that one of your family members or a close friend has a nasty diarrhoea. You briefly think if you’re going insane as you might be the unstable one feeling all these emotions at once. You never know. But it’s time to leave. You come eye to eye with the waitress to ask for the bill. She gives out a genuine smile with genuine sorrow in her eyes. You pay the bill, smile, say thank you, and leave, making her wonder why she felt so good after an ordinary gesture from a total stranger. Outside, you wish you hugged her tightly. But our contemporary rules of society does not look good towards sincere hugs coming from strangers. You get home and think why you don’t have a kryptonite to make you powerless as a superhero. You pour yourself a glass of red wine… close enough although the colour is off.

Abortion of the Inner Child

Abortion of the Inner Child

innerchild

We are born as small, cute and cuddly creatures; totally naked as there’s nothing to hide or be ashamed of, in this new, alien world. Soon as we start growing up, we display our emotions in the forms of genuine laughters or cries as honesty is always default at earlier ages. We are amazed by fireworks, cartoons etc. and believe in fairies, angels, monsters…

As children, we have huge dreams although our under-grown bodies have very limited capabilities. We are taught how to poop for instance. We think we can accomplish anything, but we are never given a chance. Our dreams get older and wither much faster than our bodies and brains.

Just as we reach our golden ages, we find out that we have to go to school and blend with the society and its unspoken rules. Just like all the junk in Pandora’s box, school teaches us useful stuff like reciting the periodic table!, as well as what’s right according to them and how to lie. All the contents of the education box are unleashed into our spongy, egg-shelled minds. Still, it never teaches us how to make deep, honest connections with others and be happy in life.

Late school era friendships start relying on selfish and personal interests. Most of us have friends so that we can show the world we are better than our buddies. We become jealous beings which will actually be the force that drives us into struggling to achieve so-called success in later life.

We graduate. We get jobs, routine becomes our thing. We work hard to afford things we don’t really need. We get bored and boring at the same time and start judging the few people, who are still clinging onto their dreams and inner child, as being immature and not acting their age. Perhaps it’s the big ball of fury and jealousy they have against us (Yes, I am with child) just because they have had an untimely abortion of their inner child.

We finally reach an age when most people expect us to die. It’s only then, we revert back to our childhood and do stuff which is considered stupid by the norms of the modern society. Luckily, old age is a great excuse to be truly ourselves just like back when we were children. But, in fact we have missed a whole chunk (the long, middle part) of our lives. The inner child has been reborn but sadly it doesn’t have much time now as it’s connected to our physical bodies. We never die alone in the end.

Magic ceased to exist for most people long ago whereas it’s all around us… just give a long hug to an upset person without uttering gibberish like “I know what you feel” or talk to your plants daily and observe the change. We are all magicians if we believe we are.

So, next time you see a child disguised in an adult meat suit,

…helplessly trying to tie their trainers…

Or…

…gaping with awe to their surroundings in a toddler’s toy shop…

Or…

…smiling upon listening to a well-known fairy tale they had heard 100 times before…

Or…

…cooking in the messiest way possible…

Just look them in the eye and hug them.

Love is all we need after all.

A New Perspective on Fitness… or an Old One

A New Perspective on Fitness… or an Old One

crowded-gym

In the first couple of millennia of human history, people roamed the globe; hunting and gathering; challenging the forces of nature on the way just for the sake of survival…


We battled with beasts (See mythology) for fame and hunted wild boars to bring home the bacon…


We constructed authentic castles standing the test of time for defence and shelter… and made the pyramids to puzzle contemporary scholars…


We used cave walls as canvas to pass on our stories…


We stood against volcanoes and thunderstorms… and when we couldn’t, we worshipped them…


But,


We never worked out inside socialised caves just for the sake of looking fit… or drew musclebound torsos on walls for admiration…


Bodies at the time required no high-protein boost bars or gymnasiums surrounded by concrete walls, cluttered with man-made steel toys to maintain fitness. The natural flow of life in the beginning turned out to be a costly hobby in the end (Taking Gym memberships and related costs into account.)


Now, we are still “hunters and gatherers” of sorts… that is hunting for attention and gathering likes for the shots of artificially pumped up muscles on social media… How else would going to an enclosed gym situated in the middle of an urban jungle in a Ferrari instead of training outdoors be explained?


Which raises the question…


Will the necessities of our current life be costly hobbies in the distant future?


Will we find other ways to sustain our bodies other than consuming “water” just to survive, for instance?


Will we be crowding H2O pubs and sharing our experience on our water-sipping stories through our personalised akashic records?

The Illusion of Freedom

The Illusion of Freedom
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Freedom exists in…


… schoolbooks,
… dictionaries,
… fairy tales,
… video games,
… dreams,

 

Or

 

… in the little daily choices we make, like having a pizza for lunch or going for a burger… and that’s only if our dietary restrictions allow us…

 

For more complex choices , the society we’ve been forced to live in by so called ‘free will’ makes the decisions…

 

With friendly imperatives starting with “Don’t…”

 

  • “…wear that…”
  • “…eat that…”
  • “…drink (that)…”
  • “…smoke (that)…”
  • “…be different…”
  • “…be weird, people are watching…”

 

All the demonstrative ‘that’ chunks uttered above vaguely indicate that they were actually remote choices of both the wrong-doer and their angelic companion bound by the unspoken rules of the society we may feel so detached from.

 

Most of us have the illusion of ‘being free as birds’, but the question is “Are birds really free?”

 

“Are they?”

 

They can fly, but so can we… by planes…

 

And that sums about everything they can do freely. They can’t swim, dive, run, write, make instrumental music, paint or have a pizza takeout etc.

 

So, why does it feel like they are the free ones?

Mixology 101

Mixology 101

gummybears

Sometimes writing does not have a purpose other than to entertain only the author himself. The piece below falls exactly under that category. Read it if you wish… but don’t expect a moral, life lessons, or whatever you expect from the stream of consciousness of a not-so-sane writer…

 

Welcome to the world of mixing up! The true essence of life and the world we live in!!!

 

Let’s start with basic emotions like joy and despair…

 

… and see how it goes by mixing the two and experiencing something totally overwhelming:

 

A standard smile involves 13 different facial muscles affecting the mouth, the lips, the cheeks, the nose and the eyes working together. Crying is a different case as each person’s style of shedding tears is distinctive so it can be a number of muscles ranging from 12 to 20 throughout your body (including a set of muscles in the abdomen and yes, I am making the number up). Now, think about crying out of joy. You may never need to go to a gym ever to work on your abdomen if you’re over-emotional.

 

Differences create art whether it’s painting,, music or some culinary magic:

 

Colours are not as meaningful on a virgin canvas when used solo. Masterpieces are created with a maelstrom of brush strokes involving a rainbow of colours. Well, even rainbows have much more than a single hue.

 

A single instrument can create good music, and feed your soul, but a band of instruments is a feast, a banquet involving no calories.

 

A tablespoon of salt is almost never consumed on its own as it’s… hmmm… too salty! But, when it goes into any kind of meal, it brings out the flavour.

 

Yin Yang! Life is indeed a giant mixture of everything. Try some alchemy in your life.

The Divine Emotions Factory

The Divine Emotions Factory
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Somewhere over the rainbow… in the divine emotions factory…. naked bodies of various races, sexes and builts with freshly installed souls move on an angelic conveyor belt, waiting for basic and advanced emotions to be imprinted into their existence. The invisible tattooing of the soul… The final ingredients to be implemented before we’re dispatched into the battlegrounds called life… In full armour… To take place in a losing battle…

 

Each body with a semi-blank soul armed only with fear, surprise and disgust reaches the ultimate needle at the end of its short journey… where more advanced emotions like jealousy, wrath and happiness (P.S: Paul Ekman was wrong.) are engraved… But, just like a tri-colour ink cartridge that went totally dry, the needle penetrates the soul with no outcome other than pain…

 

The angel in charge must have taken a piss. They pee, too… The damage is done in pee time… Where did you think all that rain came from? (It’s a pity that cheesiness is just built into every soul by default…)

 

Just before the dispatch, the horrendous error is acknowledged… It would be like sending an egg-shell-minded,defenseless child into a warzone. But, luckily there’s a hack:

 

Jealousy: Ignored completely…
Wrath: Rerouted to self…
Happiness: Reprogrammed to be copied from other souls…

 

An empath is born…

 

But the world is still not a better place…

Being Super-Empaths: A Blessing or a Curse…

Being Super-Empaths: A Blessing or a Curse…

empath-definition-wide

Being an empath is not a gift… it’s not a curse, either. It’s both: A cursed gift. It can’t be earned or learned. You’re simply born that way…

 

“Once an empath, always an empath.”

 

My earliest memory of my place in this world regarding the reason of my existence in this universe was to make people around me smile or laugh. That was a 5-year-old boys definition of happiness. I would charge up with each joyous gesture as if refueled in the most environmentally-friendly way possible, and if people around me got “happy”, I would be, too. And if I witnessed something bad happening on TV films or news, I would cry like hell. I was soon labelled as an “emotional” kid due to my infrequent bursts into tear, never taking into account all the laughter I’d created around me.

 

As I grew up and got old enough to be involved in romantic relationships, my reason of existence had evolved into making my partners and friends truly happy as I learned my lesson that smiles and laughs could easily be faked. I had become a non-lethal, emotional vampire making its prey ultra happy to feed on. But, I wasn’t sucking the bliss out of them, I was simply planting it at first, then nourishing it, mimicking it, and finally duplicating the emotion for my own personal use. And like every other empath, I was drawn to mentally unstable people with emotional scars or f*cked up minds (or rather they picked me; as empaths are always excellent listeners minus the judging or simply just because we’re “beacons of hope” for the lost and confused). I had declared a losing war against all the negative feelings that a human mind could house.

 

As I reached my middle ages, making people happy became a near-impossible job. The world we were living in, with human connection gradually fading away, was making damn sure about that. Seeds of happiness (or simply reasons of happiness) were very rare to come by in other people let alone successfully completing the whole process of planting, nourishing, mimicking and duplication. Then, it hit me!

 

Super-Empaths like myself, can never generate feelings on their own. We are simply master duplicators of feelings. Meaning, we could never be happy (or have any other feeling) on our own unless we make someone happy first. It’s a hard to swallow fact, because if we can’t make anyone happy, we start feeling how they feel regardless of the physical distance in-between. Once a friend told me to stay away as she did not want me to make me feel down by her negative feelings. Well, feelings just don’t walk to infect… They teleport.

 

“When an empath tells someone that they know how they feel… they are partially right as empaths do not know how people feel, they feel how people feel.”

 

So, I feel Super-Empaths are not human as they they (we) lack the ability to create original emotions within. We are dependent on other people to be able to experience those duplicated, alien feelings…

 

We are a dying breed… and will cease to exist as the last speck of bliss withers away from this world…