The Illusion of Freedom

The Illusion of Freedom
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Freedom exists in…


… schoolbooks,
… dictionaries,
… fairy tales,
… video games,
… dreams,

 

Or

 

… in the little daily choices we make, like having a pizza for lunch or going for a burger… and that’s only if our dietary restrictions allow us…

 

For more complex choices , the society we’ve been forced to live in by so called ‘free will’ makes the decisions…

 

With friendly imperatives starting with “Don’t…”

 

  • “…wear that…”
  • “…eat that…”
  • “…drink (that)…”
  • “…smoke (that)…”
  • “…be different…”
  • “…be weird, people are watching…”

 

All the demonstrative ‘that’ chunks uttered above vaguely indicate that they were actually remote choices of both the wrong-doer and their angelic companion bound by the unspoken rules of the society we may feel so detached from.

 

Most of us have the illusion of ‘being free as birds’, but the question is “Are birds really free?”

 

“Are they?”

 

They can fly, but so can we… by planes…

 

And that sums about everything they can do freely. They can’t swim, dive, run, write, make instrumental music, paint or have a pizza takeout etc.

 

So, why does it feel like they are the free ones?

Locked in our own Prison

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Over a 7 billion souls on Earth, with over a 7 billion distinctive characters, yet each person behaves and acts in unison defined by one set of outdated rules: The norms of society.

People laugh and cry as society dictates them to… even implying when and where to show joy or despair.

We spend our hard-earned cash by joining the race to get the jobs noone really wants. Getting involved in unleashing creativity like doing arts, crafts, music, writing, film-making does not pay, having connections do… we do everything to please the society and just to be accepted.

Freedom exists only in schoolbooks, yet everyone is directed into thinking they’re free as a bird. But, aren’t birds are freer in so many ways we can’t anticipate? They can fly forward, backward, up and down demolishing physical boundaries and… and they’re never judged for any action by their own kind. There are bird parks where they live in peace but never societies where they’re stripped off what they are. And yet again, we have the expression “bird-brained” to look down on them in a world where they literally look down on us.

Even the language tricks us: “Free will” is two words in which the latter can be considered as an indication of the future… meaning not now, maybe never. We live in a dystopia disguised as an utopia… where there are no “Free Won’t”s… not even in the language.

The society deceives us, breaks us and shapes us as if we were mass produced. Some unaware people may beg to differ but actually we “differ to beg” for so many things that we want happening in our lives. Them; acceptance… us; total freedom.

But, how? How do we achieve total freedom?

Here are some ideas:

1. Be totally honest with everyone even if you don’t want to hurt their feelings. Wounds heal but deception does not. Besides, total honesty removes any kind of communicative barrier.

2. Have no expectations from anyone, anytime. Expectations only bring disappointments but receiving without expecting is true bliss.

3. Treat your happiness as a treasure. Treat your unhappiness to feel better. If you are happy, you make everyone around you happy. It’s highly contagious.

4. Watch kids and learn from them. They can do many things that we long for.

5. Try humor if everything else fails. Try it if everything goes well, too. Humor is essential.

 

The Overuse of Lexical Items in Describing Emotions

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Language has never stopped evolving as more new words are added to the lexical pool every passing day. We are now using more words than ever, to express ourselves fully to one another. But, is it all necessary? Or are we simply dulling our senses and devolving ourselves, restricted by the limits of language itself?

In face-to-face encounters, language loses most of its function as actions take over the role of wordly structures. We never describe our actions in wordly forms when what we are doing at any given moment is so obvious. Imagine you’re in a cafe with someone, do you ever need the urge to make sentences like: “I’m now holding the cup of coffee with my left hand, preparing to take a sip.”?

Of course not, as each person is equipped with a behavioral decoder of their own. But, then again, why do we use words to describe our emotions to the other person accross the same table; saying we are happy, upset, depressed or scared… Have we disconnected and devolved so much that we can’t decode emotions without the aid of words anymore?

The joy of hugging someone and transferring our emotions in a silent harmony is what we should have been doing all along. “Wordless” does not mean it’s “worthless”, it’s just more. It’s actually feeling for each other.

We are taught to “apologize”, “praise”, “confront”, “encourage” and “congratulate” each other even before we start school… but even the words picked for such actions are random letters in tiresome, long sequences, …. difficult even to pronounce let alone understand each other’s feelings.

In writing good fiction, there’s one fundamental rule: “Show, don’t tell.” How come “showing” is more appreciated than “telling in words” at a medium where the reader and the writer is almost never in the same place?
Showing, not telling adds great value to writing, so,  perhaps, we should implement this rule to our daily lives for a change to enhance our personal relationships.

Finally,

Who is the culprit for demoting our emotions, then?

Is it the gibberish rules of society we are dictated since birth?

Is it the technological advancements causing the daily rush we find ourselves in, to get pointless things done in little time?

Is it because we are becoming more and more selfish and ignorant?

Whatever the cause, it is never late to share our feelings in an entangling bundle of limbs, enclosing two hearts within…

Social Vampires

Social Vampires

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We all have that one friend, who sucks the energy out of our souls… They are most probably not your best friend as they are nobody’s best friend but still you may come accross them quite often. Whenever you meet them, they start telling you these terrible jokes, raving about uneventful events or asking for your opinion without giving you time or even a chance to interact. You listen and as it goes on, your liveliness withers and all the energy you had moments ago, abandons you without a forwarding address. They are better known as “energy vampires”, but I like to call them “social vampires” as I am doubtful that they could feed on the pure energy output of a simple generator. You should definitely avoid them but how do you know if someone is indeed a social vampire. Luckily, they are quite similar to ancient vampires in the lore and can be identified easily by using one or more of the methods below:

  1. Just like real vamps, social vampires have the ability to hypnotize their prey. You listen to their nonsense and somehow have little desire to leave. As they are highly selfish and really don’t care about others, watch out for those who jabber about themselves all the time…

  2. Real vamps don’t have reflections in mirrors. Social vamps are quite the opposite. (They like mirrors and do have reflections, but luckily, they are easily identifiable, as they are the blurry ones in the picture). If you are in a group, take a couple of selfies and be on the lookout for the one with the biggest grin and a blurry body. Freshly fed with energy, they would be the fidgety ones, as their bodies try to break down the excess energy and have a hard time keeping their body still.

  3. Another similarity between the real deal and the social vampires, is the ability to alter memories. You never realize why you gradually felt exhausted and depressed after a couple of hours spent with a social vamp, and at the end of the day, you never blame that friend for the physical or the emotional drain. If you can’t find any reason for your sudden mood change at the end of the day, look nowhere else other than the soul sucker for the answer.

  4. Still in doubt? Stalk their social media accounts for a bit. If their feeds are full of long depressing stories about themselves or if they had made hundreds of gibberish comments for every single photo posted by their “friends”, you have found your social vamp. The similarity? Well, real vampires, too, tend to moan about themselves a lot if you befriend them; talking about how immortality is boredom for life or that how, being not able to stroll under the sun is depressing and so on.

 

Now that we can identify social vamps, how do we defeat them?

 

Remember, they are just like real vampires. Although neither a braid of garlic nor a cross  will help you defeat them, a wooden stake through the heart will work just as well. 🙂

Notes on rejection of most kinds

Being rejected for no matter what, is always depressing and we tend to get more and more rejected as we get older. However, It has nothing to do with the ageing process. It is just that the world population is out of control. With a world population of over 7 billion, there are always better versions of us, pottering around, waiting to be hand picked. We are dragged into a constant race against each other, where there are only losers.

Imagine that you were a blacksmith in the dark ages when the overpopulation was not an issue. How hard would it be for you to find a job? Or to get married with a decent lady?

These times, there are almost ten times more applicants for a mediocre job post, where every single applicant is qualified. Yet, one is most likely to be eliminated due to old age, being under or over-qualified or just the fact that your new boss does not like you. 

But, how can we cope with rejection. Here are a few cases:

1. You are a writer and you are trying to get your first book published. You get an email of rejection with no viable explanation every time you submit your manuscript. You discover that you are not amongst the lucky few who succeeds. Do not give up! Wasn’t your intention was to be read by complete strangers? Well, the editorial staff is reading them for sure. Isn’t that enough? If it isn’t, you can always try self publication and become a best seller amongst family. No?

2. You apply for every job you are qualified to change your bad luck in employment. People with less qualifications and experience seem to kick you out of that list of applicants (Yes, I am talking about the HR). Well, it’s their loss after all. Try to go to a job interview with your own ideas and projects, make a difference and if they still cross your name off, don’t bother. They never deserved you anyway. 

3. You are an average Joe in physique and you do not seem to have an attractive attribute for the opposite sex (or the same sex). People nowadays have high expectancies and with those high expectancies come huge disappointments. You cannot change people’s minds. After all, we are a dumb race. Use your flaws to your advantage. Flaws are sexy and make differences. Use them wisely. If you’re rejected, keep on going. You wouldn’t want to be with anyone who doesn’t like you anyway. Plus, being single has its own advantages.

Roses in a desert

Sometimes you just wander through an endless desert called life… Heat is intense and everything is far from being pleasent. Your constant sweating drowns you… in the slowest way possible. Drowning at a place where there’s no water. It’s hell on Earth without a parole… and you seem to be sentenced for life. Then, you come across a single red rose in the middle of the desert. It’s out of place but you don’t care… you realize that even the wildest dreams can come true and it has nothing to do with faith. It is rare but possible… like diseases that hit one in a million and you’re the sole winner….or loser. There are many more roses in the desert… oases…where there is water, too. Keep going or else you will be stuck stampeding your own footprints and you’ll sink…

Drift away!

You! The timid resident of middle of nowhere! Abandon your kingdom, leave your shell (or hell) behind and drift away… Liquidify slowly into the unknown beyond and embrace it with your most basic instinct. The unknown becomes familiar and the fear gradually melts away once you start exploring its boundaries. Drift away as when you are on the run from something, you’re actually getting closer to another thing. Choose wisely! But, even if you want to get away from negativity and all you find is more negativity in your final drift, remember that even two negatives makes a positive. Choose wisely! Choose change!